I was once asked to interview a highly respected woman for an important video project. This production was to be a motivational presentation for a large annual women’s event in my area. And as I began the interview it became immediately apparent that it would not be a quick and easy assignment because this woman’s personality, by all accounts, appeared to be largely...well, dull.
All during the interview I can remember thinking to myself, “Wow, I wonder why a more lively candidate wasn’t chosen for this piece?” Her responses were each so lackluster that I began subconsciously energizing my questioning tactics, hoping to spark some more enthusiastic and interesting answers.
Years later, through a small twist of divine fate, I was asked to direct the music at this well-loved woman’s funeral. And to my amazement I learned that she was, indeed, a genuinely extraordinary woman.
After losing her only child in a tragic accident when the girl was merely a teen, this gentle woman chose forgiveness and peace rather than bitterness and resentment. For years she worked long hours, yet she decided to enjoy her job and those with whom she associated instead of feeling weighed down and overwhelmed by her lot in life. She served as a senior missionary in a country where hardly anyone showed an interest in her message, yet she remained cheerful and optimistic, consistently seeking out and remembering the “one.”As I sat listening to the inspiring triumphs of this humble, unassuming woman, I was struck by both awe and shame because I had missed the whole point of my previous interview with this outwardly unexciting woman. I viewed her with only my worldly eyes and stony heart instead of seeking to recognize who she actually was…an angel, an example, and an honest-to-goodness believer.
I thought of the prophet Samuel, when the Lord said to him, "Look not on his countenance, or on the height of his stature... for the Lord seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance but the Lord looketh on the heart." (1 Samuel 16:7)
Regrettably, I think we're often tempted to take one quick look at another person and think we have them all figured out. We may unfairly judge them; even dismiss them, because they simply don't seem similar to us, or because we just don't have enough patience to try and understand them. Then sadly, we miss out on those potential friendships and on beautiful life lessons. I'm also quite certain we miss out on some very sweet blessings that our loving Heavenly Father had waiting just for us.Happily, I have re-discovered that merely looking upon “countenances” has proved to be occasionally misleading.
So I'm now trying MUCH HARDER to look upon hearts.
How have you seen this principle improve your relationships?
